Good things about Sex (and the City)

I've spent a lot of time writing about all of the ways Sex and the City has brought evil into the world(not to mention my life): Generating and reenforcing imagery of normalcy as white affluence, creating representations of female value as it is tied to their relationships with men, affirming stereotypes of gender dichotomies and heteronormativity. When I first heard about the release of the film incarnation of the popular television series, I could only imagine the resulting conversations and critical analyses. I shamelessly went to see the film on opening night; the theater was filled with women of all ages, congregated in large, drunken groups of their peers, dressed in heels, stumbling, laughing and yelling in the spirit of sisterhood and female empowerment.

The Sex and the City movie was fabulous. It was beautiful, well-edited, emotional and funny. And for all of the reasons I could hate it, I chose to love it, instead. I chose to appreciate growing up in a generation that produced such a glamorous portrayal of powerful, successful women. I chose to embrace the fact that Sex and the City has dramatically influenced our ability to think and talk about sex: openly, honestly and on our own terms. Women everywhere have undoubtedly benefitted from the portrayal of: positive female relationships, women with challenging careers and ambitious professional goals, and countless other revolutionary ideas illuminated through the series and film.

It isn't easy for me to ignore the thin, flawless, wealthy white characters who marginalize those of us who fail to fit into all or some of those categories. Of course I challenge the recurring theme that women are somehow incomplete, empty or restless without a heterosexual relationship in their lives. And while countless other details reflect stereotypes and essentialism, Sex and the City has defined and redefined the space women have in the media. Sex and the City brought female sexuality to our intellectual and sensual attention. It narrated the world of relationships and sex in a voice that was distinctly feminine and uniquely single.

Sex and the City reclaimed the television definition of the adult female experience as one of possibility, variety and agency. For years, the popular television audience witnessed small revolutions in the portrayal of women: Modest, temperate housewives of two parent families became career-driven working moms and powerful single parents. Women took on new responsibilities and represented a broader range of characteristics and experiences. And while Claire Huxtable and Murphy Brown were pioneers of media territory; Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte became inventors of a world some women didn't even know existed in real-life, let alone on television. The women of Sex and the City talked about orgasms, masturbating, contraception, fertility and personal choice. Our most intimate personal thoughts became interpersonal conversations of everyday life. Women were empowered to control their own sexual destiny and encouraged to dialogue with their peers along the way.

While traditional education, cultural folklore and the wisdom of our parents taught women to be the objects of male desire and fantasy, Sex and the City taught us to be the subject of our own. Sex and the City interrupted archaic notions of submission and modesty with declarations of independence, curiosity and power. If the bright, sexy, sophisticated stars of the series could purchase vibrators and discuss the nuances of anal and oral sex in public, so could we. No longer constrained by narrow rules of social engagement, women were unleashed in the sexual world as the authors of their own boundaries and expectations.

Social progress is often a product of dialogue, information acquisition and community mobilization. While I have no doubt that the creators of Sex and the City did not set out to change the world; they may have created an important historical piece of our cultural evolution. Their imagery and language generated dialogue, their adventurous content produced exposure to information, and within the context of the series and its followers, a community of sexually liberated women emerged.